Why you can’t meditate (and what to do instead)

Let’s be honest—if one more person tells you to just meditate to fix your stress, you might scream.

You’ve tried. You really have. You’ve sat down, closed your eyes, and told yourself to breathe. But within seconds, your to-do list hijacks your brain. You remember the washing, the email you forgot to send, and the fact you haven’t had a moment to yourself in days. And then you feel like a failure for not being able to “just be present.” Sound familiar?

You’re not broken. You’re not doing it wrong. You may just be burnt out.

And when your nervous system is in survival mode—wired, anxious, running on coffee and adrenaline—traditional meditation often feels impossible. Sitting still with a noisy mind can feel more like torture than peace.

Why Meditation Might Not Be Working for You

Meditation isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. It’s a practice, and like any practice, it needs the right conditions to feel supportive.

If you’re in a state of chronic stress or overwhelm, your body might not feel safe slowing down. That’s not a failure—it’s biology. Your nervous system is doing its job: keeping you alert, ready, and “on” because it thinks you need to survive. Meditation, in this state, can feel frustrating, unsafe, or even triggering.

So if you've said things like “I can’t meditate,” or “My brain just won’t switch off,” please know this: it’s not that you’re incapable of meditating. It’s that your body needs a different starting point.

What to Try Instead

You don’t have to sit cross-legged in silence to calm your nervous system. In fact, if you're in burnout or deep fatigue, you need practices that meet you where you're at—gentle, supportive, and achievable.

Here are three alternatives that can help you build towards presence and calm:

1. Walk Without Your Phone

Leave your phone behind (or on airplane mode), and just walk. Let your senses lead you—notice the light, the sounds, the temperature of the air. This kind of moving mindfulness helps your body settle without forcing stillness.

2. Five-Sense Grounding

When you're spiralling or overstimulated, try this:

• Name 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can touch

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste.

  
  

It’s a simple tool to bring you back into your body and the present moment—no meditation cushion required.

3. Soothing Rhythm

Your nervous system responds to rhythm. Try gentle swaying, rocking, or slow breathing in time with music. Even rubbing a calming oil on your hands or chest with circular motions can cue safety and relaxation.

The Key Is Safety, Not Stillness

You don’t need to sit perfectly still to heal. You need to feel safe enough in your body to begin letting go. That sense of safety is something we gently build over time.

Meditation might be part of your toolkit down the track. But for now, it’s perfectly okay to start with movement, sound, breath, or connection instead.

You deserve rest. You deserve support. And you deserve practices that work for the season you’re in—not the one you wish you were in.

If you're tired of feeling like you’re failing at self-care, I invite you to explore a different way. In my sessions we work with your body, not against it—using gentle tools that restore calm, clarity, and connection.

Ready for something that actually meets you where you are? Explore my offerings or book a free connection call here.

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